actual size

actual songs!

objects in mirror

The second actual size CD objects in mirror is TOTALLY available!

"You'd be crazy not to buy
'Objects In Mirror'!"

Actual Size

"And I presume you already have
'Measuring Up,' don't you??"

-- Steve's mom

CD #2: objects in mirror

Click here to buy it:

just $12 + shipping!

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CD #1: measuring up

Click here to buy it:

just $12 + shipping!

Ten more nutty songs, plus a bonus track!

Click on a title below to hear a quick sample:

Steve The Pirate
"I want to be an accountant -- no, a PIRATE!"

Go Forth My Son
"What made this country great? Hmmm..."

Somebody Else Got To Be Jimmy Buffet
"Ah, the dreams of youth... and booze..."

How Come You Ain't Dead Yet?
"Promises were broken... mistakes were made..."

The Dollar Bill Song
"The world's most round-about love song."

If I Was You
"Fair warning is better than no warning."

My Conservative Girlfriend
"There's something so sexy about a blonde megalomaniac."

Passing Trains
"Hopelessness is so much fun!"

Left to right:
Andy, Dick, Steve, Elvis

There You Have It, There You Are
"Another Song About Nothing!"

In A Waffle House In Alabama
"Revenge is so dang sweet."

Cowboy By Day
"Real men rope, ride, and pirouette."

Ain't No Liberal
"The gospel according to Limbaugh."

Actual Size
"That's right... we have an actual SONG called Actual Size... it explains a lot."

Extra
"Living the showbiz dream."

Lie Lie Lie (election year version)
"The world according to W."

Sex, Drugs, and Bill Monroe
"A great big bongful o' banjo."

She's Jewish
"Ya better marry yer own kind...
or not."

Travelin' Hard
"Exploring the idiotic side of corporate employment."

An Agnostic Gospel Song
"They said it couldn't be written!"

Pain
"Tell us where it hurts."

Every Man For Himself
"A republican power ballad."

Song About Nothing
"What happens when you run out of ideas?"

measuring up actual size

Steve The Pirate "I want to be an accountant -- no, a PIRATE!"

Go Forth My Son "What made this country great? Hmmm..."

Somebody Else Got To Be Jimmy Buffet "Ah, the dreams of youth... and booze..."

How Come You Ain't Dead Yet? "Promises were broken... mistakes were made..."

The Dollar Bill Song "The world's most round-about love song."

If I Was You "Fair warning is better than no warning."

My Conservative Girlfriend "There's something so sexy about a blonde megalomaniac."

Passing Trains "Hopelessness is so much fun!"

There You Have It, There You Are "Another Song About Nothing!"

In A Waffle House In Alabama "Revenge is so dang sweet."

Cowboy By Day "Real men rope, ride, and pirouette."

Ain't No Liberal "The gospel according to Limbaugh."

Actual Size "That's right... we have an actual SONG called Actual Size... it explains a lot."

Extra "Living the showbiz dream."

Lie Lie Lie (election year version) "The world according to W."

Sex, Drugs, and Bill Monroe "A great big bongful o' banjo."

She's Jewish "Ya better marry yer own kind...or not."

Travelin' Hard "Exploring the idiotic side of corporate employment."

An Agnostic Gospel Song "They said it couldn't be written!"

Pain "Tell us where it hurts."

Every Man For Himself "A republican power ballad."

Song About Nothing "What happens when you run out of ideas?"

Steve The Pirate
"I want to be an accountant -- no, a PIRATE!"

Go Forth My Son
"What made this country great? Hmmm..."

Somebody Else Got To Be Jimmy Buffet
"Ah, the dreams of youth... and booze..."

How Come You Ain't Dead Yet?
"Promises were broken... mistakes were made..."

The Dollar Bill Song
"The world's most round-about love song."

If I Was You
"Fair warning is better than no warning."

My Conservative Girlfriend
"There's something so sexy about a blonde megalomaniac."

Passing Trains
"Hopelessness is so much fun!"

There You Have It, There You Are
"Another Song About Nothing!"

In A Waffle House In Alabama
"Revenge is so dang sweet."

Cowboy By Day
"Real men rope, ride, and pirouette."

Ain't No Liberal
"The gospel according to Limbaugh."

Actual Size
"That's right... we have an actual SONG called Actual Size... it explains a lot."

Extra
"Living the showbiz dream."

Lie Lie Lie (election year version)
"The world according to W."

Sex, Drugs, and Bill Monroe
"A great big bongful o' banjo."

She's Jewish
"Ya better marry yer own kind...
or not."

Travelin' Hard
"Exploring the idiotic side of corporate employment."

An Agnostic Gospel Song
"They said it couldn't be written!"

Pain
"Tell us where it hurts."

Every Man For Himself
"A republican power ballad."

Song About Nothing
"What happens when you run out of ideas?"